Quote:
Originally Posted by viddy
I also find parties are a bit shallow. I really tend to enjoy the deeper conversations about life, and art, philosophy, etc etc. Parties tend to have shallower conversations about who/what/where. Less of the good stuff, and instead more drinking and dancing. I think you just have to accept parties, and going out to the bar for what it is. I really hate all of the boring effort bullshit you have to put forth when meeting new people. But like I was saying above, being comfortable with myself, I find that I'm starting to take a bit more active interest in other people, even if I'm only going through the conversational motions of "meeting people".
And I still find it very rare that I really strike a chord with someone.
Hope that helps or makes you feel not so alone.  |
i think ive lost all confidence in myself after what happened as well. what happened is a very long story, and me, and religion. i dont think the smoke with ever clear. maybe in 15 years or so. and today! or yesterday rather. my girlfriend right? well, we never had the title of boyfriend/girlfriend. we were friends, and we became closer, and closer, and closer, until finally, we ended up just doing what boyfriends and girlfriends do together without having the title, even the physical part so you all know im not just, exaggerating. i asked her yesterday for the title. i wanted to be her actual boyfriend, i wanted us to be an actual couple. without hesitation she says its best if we stayed friends. she was almost, enthusiastic about it. i bursted into tears, because every person i apparently let into my life, i get close to. they end up giving me the raw end and throwing me through a loop.
im so sick right now with myself