[dubman]

all those boards they pretend to play is really just a clever disguise for ricks hidden and shameful secret: he loves macaroni and cheese.

it's actually really elaborate. they hire a whole panel of set designers to intricately mimic the knobs and things of Nord Leads, 909s, Korgs and the rest of their vast array of "instruments", and they painstakingly construct a paper mache facsimile so that rick can secretly duck his hands underneath and let his long alien fingers muck around in mac and cheese for 2 hours.

it's gotten so bad that poor darren price was hired purely because rick, getting old and cranky, wanted to stop pushing the single play button altogether, and even briefly considered setting up a mic so that the audience could hear him "jam" with the stickly wet sounds of his fingers swimming in mac and cheese. "what?" he asked, "i love it, and they're fans right? it's only honest, and i'll enjoy myself a lot more instead of hearing this silly thumpity-bump stuffs." fellow bandmate karl almost relented, until the tour crew flatly refused to accept that a bulk of their load would come from the weight of ceramic bowls and boxes of dried noodles.
darren doesnt even know what he's doing up there, just random shuffling about while trying to hide his embarassment at ricks obviously fetishistic enjoyment of his many bowls of cheesy noodles.
those thumbs up at the end of each show? look closely. i have. even though he tricked to lick it all off, those spaces on each end of the fingernails are packed with gooey cheese. i told fellow concert-goer dc_04 to get some video of THAT but he called me a faggot and tried to sic security on me for telling him i was 21 so he could buy me a drink.